ABSTRACT
There must not be too many ideas (two or three will usually suffice), but plenty of opinions; the bland, obvious or fence-sitting must be ruthlessly expunged. Columns are there to get a reaction – agreement, disagreement, amusement, enlightenment. Intolerance is often a virtue. ‘So what?’ will not do. The column must sustain its theme, building towards a climax or pay-off line. If it wanders the reader will wander on. Peter Cole, Guardian
Don’t get disheartened when you receive the inevitable hate mail that being a really good columnist brings. If you’ve made someone seethe, then you’ve made them think and that’s your job. . . . Besides, the vitriolic ones make good firelighters, I find. Stacia Briggs of the Evening News, Norwich, in Press Gazette
What most columnists don’t get is that we are part of the entertainment industry as well. You know, there’s no divine right to be read and I like to think that people who turn to my page don’t know if they’re going to get a polemic or a song and dance act or a page of jokes. Richard Littlejohn of the Daily Mail, in British Journalism Review
If you can make the readers laugh or just smile you’ve probably got their attention, no matter what the subject matter. But don’t force it, never, never force it. Facetiousness is not attractive. . . . Writing a funny column can be the most difficult labour of all. But when it works it’s also the most satisfying. Barry Norman of Radio Times
Sometimes, just sometimes, columns are easy. An idea or story captures your imagination, an arresting opening line presents itself, and the piece flows from your fingers as they skip joyfully and unstoppably across the keyboard. It makes perfect sense, it has the right pace and rhythm, it’s funny, it hits a nerve and everyone writes in to say they laughed and/or agreed with you.
