ABSTRACT
Gone are the days in which society ignored the emotional lives of children. Today we assume that the childhood environment molds and directs the person we become in adulthood. The ACE study (Felitti et al., 1998) has opened our collective eyes to the concerns of chronic childhood trauma. Psychologists such as William Worden have helped to shine a spotlight on how children grieve. I hope we have come a long way toward knowledge and enlightenment from his 1996 book, Children and Grief. His work opens with the question “Do Children Mourn?” as if implying that in years past, the conventional wisdom was that kids were immune from the effects of a loss in the family. Today, we are sensitive to the emotional and psychological needs of young people. We recognize that although the event that starts the grief process—the death itself—may be just one event in a child’s life, the consequences of the loss have no expiration date. The pain of loss is a constant ache, a reminder of the lost love. It is therefore reasonable to assume that grief, too, is a chronic source of stress. Research has shown that mourning refers to a lost attachment, so strengthening other relationships can help to lessen the pain of loss (Ludy-Dobson & Perry, 2010). With this thought it mind, our focus should turn toward cultivating bonds with students that encourage personal growth along with academic achievement. It is time for us to be cognizant of how grief can invade a child’s life and create issues at home, school, and wherever else the child ventures. As guardians of the place where children spend a great part of their lives, educators have a responsibility to empathize with the ways in which children grieve. We should be mindful of how bereavement manifests in school. School staff form strong attachments to our youth and have an incredible influence on their lives. By acting with knowledge and sensitivity, we can be life preservers. We have the chance to help students navigate the rip tide of grief.
