ABSTRACT
I have met exceptionally few parents whose goal in life was to banish their child's emotional well-being, trying diligently to pur posefully do them in; I have met many parents who after talking to them I couldn't understand why they didn't want to do their child(ren) in ! A majority of parents have good intentions but because oftheir difficulty in accepting what they cannot do for their child are unable to back up their positive intentions with the right disciplinary, ignoring and/or supportive, affirming methods. Even when in the throes of yelling, nagging, or otherwise trying to corral their child, they maintain a sense of love for and confidence in their targeted child. At other times what is hidden behind such negative parental antics are caring parents whose harsh words are their way of giving vent to their fears; they are afraid that unless they robustly intervene their child will cause himself severe harm. The last objec tive behind the parents ' emotional smokescreen is to prevent harm to their child. If they didn't care for their child, think she could do better by gaining advantages for herself, and weren't afraid that her oppositionalism and/or underachievement might eventually do seri ous harm to her long-range goals and ambitions, they wouldn't bother to lift a finger on her behalf. Such roundabout encourage ment may not appear very constructive, but is really a futile attempt to persuade the child to concentrate on her potentials and capabili ties.
