chapter  1
He Sure Doesn’t Look Depressed
Pages 22

Andy is a 31-year-old corporate manager who batters his wife physically and emotionally. Their relationship follows a predictable pattern-they argue over little things, and the tension between them builds for several days until Andy “blows up.” On some occasions, he has hurt his wife so badly that she has had to be hospitalized. She has left him several times, but he has always been able to “charm” her back. In the days that follow the beatings, Andy is extremely remorseful. He apologizes profusely, brings home fl owers, and takes his wife out to dinner at fi ne restaurants. But this honeymoon period never lasts for more than a few days. Soon the confl ict begins to escalate, and it always culminates in another beating. Andy wants to love his wife consistently in “normal” ways, and sincerely does not want to hit her, but he has been unsuccessful at trying to change this pattern.