ABSTRACT
We propose that there is some truth in both of these assertions, with the first having more generality than the second. We further suggest that the intrinsic tension between these two viewpoints impels individuals to find ways to “manage” empathic accuracy in their close relationships. As we hope to demonstrate through a review of relevant theory and research, empathic accuracy must be carefully managed because of its potential to hurt as well as to heal, to cause injury as well as to avoid or ameliorate it. Our goal in this chapter is to shed some light on the processes by which perceivers attempt to navigate through the perilous waters of knowing what they should know-and not knowing what they should not know-about their partners’ thoughts and feelings.
