ABSTRACT
The stage of restructuring is heralded by the recognition, often first by the stepparent, that it is necessary for some changes to occur in the stepfamily. The stepparent begins to try to initiate such changes, sometimes through a series of confrontations with their spouse. Stepfathers tend to try to establish rules about discipline, those who have not previously been fathers seeing this as a way to find a role in the stepfamily, while those who have left their own children often feel guilty about not being a full-time father to them and try to compensate by being a firm father figure to their
stepchildren. Stepmothers, on the other hand, tend to try too hard and too soon to develop affectionate relationships with their stepchildren and, when they fail to do so, blame themselves, become depressed and may ultimately seek help (usually) for themselves.
