ABSTRACT
So much of what affects relationships and even the psychology of individuals consists of simple facts. Some of these facts may change, as experience and interaction proceed-for example, in the case of a temporary financial setback or a serious illness that can be cured. But for the most part, facts are realities that cannot be changed and that the individual or the family must live with forever. A partial list of these would include early deaths of family members, malnutrition, child abuse, genetic heritage, disabilities, adoption, and school performance (Boszormenyi-Nagy & Krasner, 1986). We have no control over these realities, but they affect who we are as individuals and how we engage in relationships.
