ABSTRACT
A child’s distress or difficult behaviour may be an indication that a family is in difficulty. If we see the family as a system with its own sets of values and beliefs, and its own ‘scripts’ for ways of communicating with one another and managing daily life, then the self of each member of the family will be influenced by the family pattern (Byng-Hall 1995). This pattern is largely brought by the parents from their families of origin and is learned by each child by living it. If the pattern becomes confusing or destructive, or if it is unable adequately to manage traumatic loss, then help to the whole family may be more useful than help to the child alone.
