ABSTRACT
Near the end of the semester in my course on gender and violence, the class was discussing how to prevent violence and abuse in intimate relationships. One of my students, Kristin, brought with her a piece of pink paper that she had found in her coed residence hall mailbox. 1 Written on the paper were tips on how to prevent becoming a victim of rape. Those tips included advice such as not going to parties alone, being aware of your surroundings, and not leaving drinks unattended for fear of the date rape drug being used. She noticed that only about half of the mailboxes had these pink pieces of paper. When looking more closely at the mailboxes, it appeared that only the women received these flyers. She asked the desk attendant if any of the men had received the same pink sheets of paper. No, they had not. In class, Kristin said that she probably would not have thought twice about this situation except that we had been talking all semester about how we hold the victim or potential victims responsible for ending and preventing abuse. She raised the point that by excluding men from the distribution of these flyers, it was not only assumed that men could not be victims, but also that men were not responsible for whether or not women on campus were raped. No flyers were given to students that said friends should not let friends make jokes about violence, abuse, or rape. No flyers told students that it was wrong to assault other people, or that people should help create an atmosphere where the attitudes and behaviors that fostered rape are eliminated.
