SELF-ESTRANGEMENT AND RELATIONSHIPS As I have argued, Kant establishes the ‘moral law’ as external to our everyday lives and experience. We have to aspire to live moral lives, being ready to do what we ‘ought to do’, regardless of what we feel. In this way, we separate ourselves from developing a sense of our emotional needs and wants. As men, we develop very little relationship with these parts of ourselves. This becomes the source of self-estrangement that is taken for granted in our definitions of masculinity.