ABSTRACT

We naturally create stories to help us make meaning of our world, but in conflict situations the kinds of stories we typically tell ourselves can actually make it harder for us to manage and resolve the conflict constructively. This book provides an accessible framework for understanding why people tell their conflict stories the way they do, and how to help them move away from conflict stories that prevent them from understanding and responding to conflict in an effective way.

Presented using highly engaging and accessible cases, the book is designed to help people working with others in conflict to fully support them by understanding which areas of the conflict story to focus their attention on, and using practical techniques to support people to rewrite their story into a more constructive one to better manage the situation. The book also provides practical strategies to help people who are themselves in a conflict scenario to rewrite and enact a version of their conflict story that helps them to more constructively manage, and often resolve, their situation. A conflict management coaching system is introduced that is designed to address the particular problems created by dysfunctional conflict stories.

This is a book specifically for those who work with people in conflict (mediators, conflict coaches, managers, lawyers, HR staff, teachers) and also for anyone who wishes to better understand their own experience of conflict.

part 1|88 pages

Conflict Stories

chapter 1|7 pages

Conflict stories, narrative, and genre

chapter 2|12 pages

Melodrama

chapter 3|10 pages

The melodramatic conflict narrative

chapter 4|15 pages

Melodramatic victims

chapter 5|9 pages

Melodramatic villains

chapter 6|9 pages

The problem with melodramatic narratives

chapter 7|15 pages

Tragedy

The alternative conflict story

chapter 8|9 pages

The shift from melodrama to tragedy

part 2|74 pages

Conflict Coaching to Support Story Development

chapter 9|14 pages

Coaching to facilitate the shift

chapter 10|12 pages

Simple to complex

chapter 11|10 pages

Certain to uncertain

chapter 12|8 pages

Passive to active

chapter 13|9 pages

Dependence to agency

chapter 14|6 pages

Past to future

chapter 15|7 pages

Suffering to learning

chapter 16|6 pages

The REAL Conflict Coaching System™