ABSTRACT
My anxiety level was high, and it was time to do something about it. I had reached a particular level of anxiety that corresponded to the resonant frequency of my brain; one more day in this state and it would explode. I needed to either elevate it to a frequency that only dogs hear or decrease it to a reasonable level so I could focus my anxiety on things like nuclear war, famine, torture in Third World countries, Beirut, Afghanistan, Lebanon, the West Bank, crack, the homeless, and my relationship with my mother. In short, it was time to take the Test.
