ABSTRACT
Misogyny is usually associated with men who hate women. But some women also hate women. The objects of their hate can be mothers, sisters, daughters or rivals. But the most common object of their hate is themselves. Depression, self-harm, eating disorders, excessive drinking, drug taking, even addiction to plastic surgery are often manifestations of self-hatred. The author considers writer Virginia Woolf’s episodes of mania and depression and her eventual suicide, and the likely connection to the early loss of her mother and her experience of sexual abuse as a child. She looks at the legacy of self-hatred some women experience as a result of their toxic relationships with domineering, controlling and abusive mothers. She considers the plight of women whose self-hatred drives them to court dangerous situations with abusive men to prove how worthless they are. She tells the story of Marie, who was compelled to hang around low-life bars late at night and pick up men who disgusted her. She discusses BDSM (bondage, domination and sadomasochism) and tells the story of Vivienne and her toxic relationship with her violent and abusive mother, and how she finally found sexual relief and fulfilment through bondage.
