chapter  Letter 19
Working with Bullies
WithTara Goldstein, benjamin lee hicks, Jenny Salisbury, Pam Baer
Pages 6

This chapter discusses the ideas parent Nazbah Tom shared with us about working with bullies. A child who bullies needs to be told they are a good person but that their behaviour needs to change. Nazbah is Catherine Hernandez’s partner, identifies as Two-Spirit, and uses the pronoun “they”. The reflection they shared with us comes from their own experience of being a bully and was provoked by Catherine’s story of her daughter’s experience with bullying at school. Bullies need to learn how to relate to people in new ways, and it's the job of teachers and principals to teach them new skills. Educator Barbara Coloroso, who has been writing and teaching about school bullying for many years, believes that discipline is a constructive and compassionate response to bullying. Her model takes into account the intent of the bullying, the severity of the behaviour, and the restorative steps needed to support bullies in changing their behaviour.