ABSTRACT
Most children do not feel listened to. Something else to remember: Children always raise their voices when they want to be heard and they are not aware of this. To admonish them for speaking rudely will only exacerbate a bad situation. They will feel judged and criticized, and definitely not heard. To begin the therapy encounter we begin with the relationship. A fundamental component of establishing an I/Thou relationship is to meet the client where he or she is, with honour and respect. Understanding the natural development of children facilitates this process. However, therapists should never underestimate what a young child is capable of doing and responding in the therapeutic encounter. Making an assumptive statement is very relieving to the child. Remember that developmentally a child is still egocentric, especially when emotions are involved, and has trouble understanding another's point of view.
