ABSTRACT
One way of thinking about violence would be to consider the stories that are available in 1992. Two especially seem to prevail. One, the feminist position, conceptualizes violence towards woman as being a product of women being victims of an oppressive male-dominated society. The second, the systemic orientation, moves away from the whole victim/victimizer dichotomy, choosing to focus more on the patterns of interaction that connect people and that trigger violent patterns of behaviour. The irreverent perspective allows the freedom to respect the values of both of these orientations without being restricted to absolute adherence to either one. In many instances, couples involved in violence are willing to die for those relationships, willing to die for the passion, willing to risk their lives. Some therapists have difficulty understanding this since they, themselves, would rather divorce—just pay the legal fees and go.
