ABSTRACT
John and Mary were in their mid-thirties and had been married for four years when they came for help. The presenting problem was their concern over the lack of sex in their relationship and their constant rows. After they married, Mary put on more weight, and John found her less attractive sexually—mostly because he felt this displayed a lack of the self-discipline he had so much admired. However, the marriage deteriorated as John increased his demands that Mary be self-sufficient in their relationship. Sex came to an end between them. The issue of control also affected their sexual relationship. Sex had been wonderful when they first met. Both had felt free to enjoy themselves. There were also fears surrounding sex itself. Thus, Mary's sex education experience was very restricted; messages were implicit and surrounded by folklore. The only woman in his life was his mother, who gave John the impression that sex was a bad and dirty thing.
