ABSTRACT
The ability to be compassionate or comforting or curious with others, which comes so easily to many trauma survivors, is not matched by the ability to offer themselves the same kindness. The internalization of secure attachment allows individuals to tolerate hurt, loneliness, anxiety, disappointment, frustration, and rejection—all the risks inherent in any close relationship. Mindfulness has an important role to play in the treatment of trauma because of its effects on the brain and body. The concept of 'self' in Internal Family Systems helps clients connect to states of compassion, creativity, curiosity, and perspective, while the going on with normal life self of the Structural Dissociation model emphasizes the importance of developing the functional ability to take action to implement decisions for the sake of the system. "Befriending" one's parts is not simply a therapeutic intervention: it also contributes to developing the practice of self-acceptance, one part at a time.
