ABSTRACT
This chapter extends our consideration of bereavement beyond the marital relationship (which has informed existing theories of grief) to the death of a son or daughter at various ages. As indicated in the previous chapters, the type of relationship with the deceased will be the most important predictor of the severity and course of grief. Studies carried out in several western societies show that marital bereavement is often viewed as producing the most severe form of grief. Questionnaire ratings show that it is perceived by most people as the life crisis from which it would take longest to recover (Holmes and Rahe, 1967). Despite this finding, a form of loss that has been found to evoke more intense grief-at least in modern western societies (cf. Scheper-Hughes, 1992)—is death of a son or daughter during infancy or childhood (Burnett et al., 1997; Klass, 1988; Leahy, 1992-3; Middleton et al., 1996; Sanders, 1979-80, 1989; Singh and Raphael, 1981). One crucial feature is that parents lose all their associated hopes and dreams for the future, the ‘promise’ recognised in the second line of Robert Bridges’ poem. What Klass (1988:13) described as ‘an empty historical track’ is set up. Grief can be very long lasting, staying with the parents for
Perfect little body, without fault or stain on thee, With promise of strength and manhood full and fair! Though cold and stark and bare, The bloom and the charm of life doth awhile remain on thee.
