ABSTRACT
I never saw my mother and father openly disagree. Instead I can remember sensing my mother's or father'S withdrawal from each other when they were upset. It was as if the warm, loving side of them that I was used to was turned off and there was a cold distance there instead. Consequently, I found myself often holding back in my family when I was angry, not saying what was on my mind, and being very careful when I did disagree with either of them. When I got married, I found myself falling into the same patterns with my husband of avoiding open disagreement even when I felt strongly about something. Instead of directly informing him when I was angry or disagreeing with him openly, I signaled it indirectly by my withdrawal.
