ABSTRACT
An intimate, undistorted personal relationship with one’s own anger is rare because of the cultural and familial conditioning which skews an individual’s relationship with it. Distorted patterns of anger (see Chapter 5) also abound in professional trainings of all kinds because the learning culture is infused with Britain and America’s negative ideas about its nature which inhibit both the expressing and hearing of it. These misunderstandings include that its presence indicates an absence of love; that it will escalate into violence; that there’s a problem so someone has to be to blame (and it’s not going to be me!); or that there’s a problem and I have to fix it (and I’ve no idea how!). As a consequence, there are a significant number of helping practitioners who remain estranged from their anger or have a less than honest relationship with it. It follows then that professional trainings and therapeutic help must counter such conditioning, provide new information about anger and encourage its expression rather than distortion. This chapter addresses the important task of supporting practitioners and their clients alike to express their anger in a respectful and relational way, and offers models which guide this process.
