ABSTRACT
H ere's a story of a real person! who -once upon a time - believed this mythand, as a result, did not live very happily ever after: [Kate! twenty-something female university student! single}
Here's another person's tale:
Sociologist Mary Laner - an expert on dating, courtship, and marriage - suggested that the depersonalization inherent in our mass media society might lead to unrealistically high expectations and individual longings for a close relationship in which one person will satisfy every need - as in the"Ozzie and Harriet mythology,,2 (as cited in Blanc, 1994, p. 14). Intellectually, most of us realize that no one else can make us happy or sad, but in our heart we don't always accept that. Lazarus (1985) warned that "one of the most unfortunate errors" people make is surrendering responsibility for our own gratification and fulfillment. As he memorably phrased it:
mediated script, can you? And I can't imagine turning on the radio and hearing the revised healthy lyrics (such as "I
chose to love you. I must have wanted to do it then, but now I've changed my mind.") that psychologist and author Wayne Dyer (1976) suggested we substitute in place of some of the irrational yet subtly influential statements of some popular songs (such as "I can't live, if living is without you," "You make me so very happy," "You're nobody till somebody cares," and "You make me feel like a natural woman"). Dyer cautioned: "Those sweet harmless lyrics may be more damaging than you realize" (pp. 69-70), but he admitted that his revisions probably wouldn't sell.
