ABSTRACT
Sexual violence in some of our Samoan and Tongan families occurs in both church and community settings, just as it does in other human families. Often these situations are shrouded in secrecy and silence in order to maintain the traditional values of respect, solidarity, and resilience within families and the wider community. Sexual abuse in our Pasifika families and church communities has been highlighted here in order to illustrate how our fundamental values of respect, solidarity, and resilience 1 are often challenged in the process of counseling. When abuse happens, these values are shattered and, although the restoration of these values may occur over time, the reality is that in some cases it may not happen at all because of the ongoing and unpredictable nature of the healing journey for the clients and families involved. When a Samoan or Tongan survivor walks into the counseling room, his or her nonverbal language speaks volumes to me. Common emotions presented are those of anger, shame, broken trust, pain, intense guilt, self-blame, despair, depression, and isolation from family. Through the tears of these survivors, I am immediately drawn in to their sense of pain and brokenness, which provides an immediate platform for the initial counseling sessions.
