ABSTRACT
Never separating from mother’s body. Many borderlines remained • fused with the maternal object and confuse sexuality with love and intimacy. In love relationships, they often will become the “Don Juans,” or “femme fatales” (Marilyn Monroe, Madonna), as their confused sexual identity oers them a pretext to be sexually alluring. Bonding with pain; diculty in early attachment bonding relations.• Hypersensitivity to criticism or rejection. Feeling of “needing” someone • else to survive; constant need for validation and reassurance. Hard time controlling and regulating their emotions; emotions have a • stranglehold on them. Chronic feelings of emptiness or boredom (the black hole), an empti-• ness so pervasive that it seemingly can never be lled, but in an attempt to try to ll it, they become insatiable. “More drugs! More sex! More cuts on my wrists!” A “false self” that belies the “true self,” marked by persistent identity • disturbance, including shifts in self-image, sexual orientation, career choices, or other long-term goals. A preoccupation with what people think; taking on a chameleon-like • self to please people. A neediness to nd someone in order to survive, which contributes • to chaotic, intense relationships characterized by splitting (uctuations between love and hate). Victimization often accompanied by psychosomatic illness (bond with • their objects through pain as the replacement for love). Problems with object constancy; diculty with separation causes them • to fuse with the object because they cannot hold onto or recreate the image or memory of the object.
