ABSTRACT
In conclusion, I reflect on two further issues of significance in understanding, loving and helping traumatized children. First, I draw attention to the danger of forgetting that there is more to a traumatized child than his/her trauma. As we work to help children move past or out of trauma, we need to help them develop a healthy sense of playfulness in hopes that they will at last be able to come to a sense of self that knows some joy. Second, I point out the fallacy of the cultural platitude “all you need is love”, arguing that love is neither all that matters, nor even the most important thing for a child who has been traumatized. I argue that we need to be much more careful about the grandiose claims we make regarding love, and that the idea of unconditional love is an especially insidious trap, particularly for members of subjugated identity groups (including mothers). I remind readers that in trauma work as with everything, the importance of difference – different bodies, different identities – is paramount in our ability to understand and respond to the realities of people’s lives and traumatic experiences. Finally, I leave readers with my sense of the importance of philosophy done in particular ways (a feminist-relational-narrative-phenomenological philosophy) for the project of constructing a morally responsible life/story.
