ABSTRACT
The criticality of vā as a relational space whereby the ‘self’ is constructed and mediated in relation to others is a representation of autoethnographic relativity. This paper highlights the cross-cultural shifting of relationships and the challenges and contradictions as part of navigating the multiple spaces as a New Zealand-raised Tongan male. Though the notion of ‘struggle’ is often linked to cultural dominance and power, the way that it positions the ‘other’ as lesser or of little significance is done through a repressive view and is therefore debilitating. As a Tongan male struggling to fit into life in Aotearoa, even when taking a traditional cultural position, this can lead to another form of dominance that invalidates my experiences in New Zealand as in-authentic. To signify fluidity as oppose to permanence, for New Zealand-raised Tongan males, the struggle to walk the two worlds – as a New Zealand-raised and Tongan male – is necessary and required because to emphasise the significance of one over the other is unhelpful and denies the ‘self’ in and amongst others as lacking possibilities.
