ABSTRACT
This book is not a memoir of my son, Andrew Jacob Daher. Nor is this book very much about who I am, as his father. Rather, these reflections are about a father in grief and struggling to make sense of the tragic death of his son. I first and foremost wanted to share my stories and whatever insights I have rendered from them with others who have experienced sudden (or even not so sudden) loss of loved ones, and in particular, fathers and mothers whose children have died. In observing my own capacities in grief, or more to the point, lack of capacity, I was aware that I could not read for long periods of time. Books on death and grief that friends steered me toward were often too dense and required too much concentration. In my constant pain, focused and consistent attentiveness was not often an option. What I found I could sustain was reading short passages by authors who had experienced grief, telling about what happened to them and how they were coping.
