ABSTRACT
The “spot,” both external and internal, that is associated with an anguishing episode, a violation or death, becomes entangled and overgrown with a mythology of distorted memories and imaginings, and as a consequence, within the “victim’s” life, it is invested with an enormously negative influence. The impetus for healing that accompanies such confrontation involves a number of therapeutic factors. When the avoided spot is confronted, the person is freed at last to relinquish the lie and make the transition from imploded grief to an open expression of that grief. The word that seems to fit best is “acceptance.” For a decision to face the avoided reality, is a decision at least in embryo, to come to terms with or to make peace with the wounding event. Acceptance is a facing of our shadow side and acknowledging that it has been and is part of our life.
