ABSTRACT
A common misconception about consensual nonmonogamy is that people who accept such relationships don’t feel jealous. Some people may not be suited for honest multipartnering, but my research and clinical experience reveal that for those who have experience and skill in dealing honestly with more than one relationship or sexual partner, many report feeling jealousy at times, or even frequently. In consensual nonmonogamy, love, honesty, and freedom are valued over jealousy. Difficult feelings are to be supported and examined. Personal growth is required for success. All partners have to figure out what helps any of them minimize jealousy, repair as necessary, and keep going. The goal is for each partner to manage jealousy well enough so that it does not impair relationships or daily life. Each of the following assessments and interventions are discussed for use when one or more partners come into the office needing help with jealousy: Assess the relationship format, perceived causes of jealousy, and precipitating incidents; teach skills for managing ongoing jealousy; help partners find ways of keeping jealousy to a minimum; use techniques for healing jealousy; teach compersion as a personal development; and other clinical interventions generally found helpful in dealing with jealousy. Case examples include couples in expanded monogamy and polyamorous partners.
