ABSTRACT
This paper discusses the many factors that make for permanence in relationships. Some are practical and relate to the historical provisions of the marriage contract such as economics, child rearing, and social/familial concerns.
Others have to do with attachments needs, the instinctive drive towards safety which propels us to stay near someone who is discriminated as significant to our well being. Dysfunctional attachment needs are discussed as well as the difference between attachment and mature love.
This chapter discusses the factors that make for permanence in relationships. Some are practical and relate to the historical provisions of the marriage contract such as economics, child rearing, and social/familial concerns. Others have to do with attachments needs, the instinctive drive towards safety which propels people to stay near someone who is discriminated as significant to one’s well-being. Dysfunctional attachment needs are discussed as well as the difference between attachment and mature love. John Bowlby defines attachment as a form of behavior that results in a person attaining or maintaining proximity to some other clearly identified individual who is conceived as better able to cope with the world. The marriage was a contract with considerations of property, political security, and inheritance holding great significance. Romantic love was expected to occur outside of marriage and it was understood that this might lead to adulterous liaisons.
