ABSTRACT
Fennell observes that 'rules have their roots in experience. Sometimes people can trace them back to particular early memories, or to sayings that were current in the household where they grew up. Identifying these may help you to understand the adopted policies'. For example, a client remembered her parents telling her not to 'get above you' when 'I started to sing my own praises or feel good about myself'. The client said she still remembers and follows her parents' injunction which stops her from taking pride in her achievements or enjoying the praise of others as this would mean 'I'm being conceited'. Another client said he had 'perfectionists as parents' who pushed their children to the best at everything they did: 'The family motto was "Always be first"'. While following this motto had helped the client to make considerable success in life through relentless determination, the physical and psychological costs of such determination were also much.
