ABSTRACT
In a long-term relationship some behaviors get elevated to symbolic status; that is, they stand for something far more important to the relation-ship than they appear to an outsider. The power of the symbolic behavior can bring forth a strong positive or negative emotional response and the outside observer might be amazed that a simple statement or action could cause a reaction of such magnitude. The marriage and family therapist often encounters these symbolic behaviors that produce negative consequences and continue to persist in spite of therapeutic interventions, even though both partners sincerely want to change the emotional fallout of these interactions. If a divorce occurs, then the symbolic meaning of the interaction may be lost and not necessarily transferred to a new partner.
