The Nagging Wives
Once there were two women. They were forever quarreling. Why they didn’t get along, I couldn’t say any more. They always stood there and squabbled in the street. They were neighbors. One day they went outside again and began to quarrel; they were on either side of the road but close to each other for the road was narrow. The dispute between them grew so ugly that they hurled the worst insults and filth at one another. The husband of one of the women was at home; he was inside the room. After a while he came out and said:“Will you put an end to all this nastiness, or will you keep at it? Haven’t you had enough of this bickering?”The women didn’t let up.He said: “Come in, woman. You prepared the leaven, you should be kneading the dough now but you don’t. Well, do you expect me to do it while you are standing there fighting? Come in!”“Oh, no, I won’t!”The best was yet to come. The woman picked up her skirt, lifted it over her head, turned around and said:“So there! This is the kind of woman you are!” and she showed everything she had. They didn’t know what outrage to think of next-they turned up their skirts and
pointed their behinds at each other. They both did the same. Then the man, the woman’s husband, came out again and said:“Come in, woman-I finished kneading the dough, it should be put into the pan, come in!”She said: “I am not coming, because if I leave I will be stuck with the insult that I am like her behind. Let her go inside first!”Said the man: “Come in, woman, the dough is getting runny and sour. Come in, the oven has to be lit!”“Oh, no, I won’t! I’ll be stuck with the insult.”All the while she, too, was on all fours, showing her backside. Well, the man went in and put the dough in the pan. He did it to allow the women to finish with their business. But now the oven had to be lit, so he went out again. (He was as crazy as his wife!) “Come in, the oven has to be lit, come in!”“I won’t come now, I don’t want her insult to stick with me like a curse!”Said the man: “Come in, woman, I’ll take your place. I’ll push down my trousers and I’ll show her mine.”He said it softly so the other woman wouldn’t hear: “I’ll take your place, comein!” He lowered his trousers and got down on all fours:“Here, woman, look!”She didn’t notice that the two had switched-she thought it was still the woman showing her buttocks. She didn’t know that the woman had gone inside to attend to her work and that the man had taken her place. When she looked back and saw, she began to clap: “You are it! You are it! You are stuck with the insult, for you kept showing your arse until your guts popped out like a sausage. You see, it’s your fault, you are saddled with it,” she said. “Woman, your rectum has dropped down, you are it!”Then the woman went inside and the man did too. They made peace with each other and there was no more quarreling. They are still alive today, if they haven’t died.It was the man’s fault. Why didn’t he grab the woman by the hair and pull her into the house? Why did he let them go on with their bickering?