Getting to Know the Couple and Introducing the Model
Tracking is a powerful tool that was developed by the early pioneers in family therapy as a way of exploring patterns of behavior, and adapted by Schwartz to track internal sequences. Therefore, Intimacy from the Inside Out (IFIO) therapists are interested in motivation, not content. The purpose of tracking a couple's cycle is threefold. First, by staying horizontal and going back and forth between members of the couple to flesh out their dynamic, the therapist helps them see that their fight is repetitive, predictable and circular in nature. Second, the therapist wants them to understand that their fight is motivated by strong feelings. Tracking slows them down so the therapist can help them look inside and understand the hopes and fears of their protectors. Third, the therapist makes an invitation to both partners to consider how their interactions would be different if they experienced less reactivity and more choice in responding. Throughout the therapist encourages them to try something different.