ABSTRACT
The couple needs to voice their expectations of each other and discuss limitations they think they have. It is very useful and important to have the couple note and discuss ways that they currently take care of each other. The therapist may need to note that there are many ways of caring for each other and that this is bidirectional, lest the HIV-negative partner gets automatically labeled as "the caretaker" in the relationship. Couples may need help realizing that the HIV-positive partner can help and nurture his or her HIV-negative partner, even in the context of illness progression. A very simple and concrete example is teaching the HIV-positive partner to inquire as to how the HIV-negative partner is coping with new physical symptoms or new health care demands being placed on him or her. This can help maintain "emotional equality" in the relationship, even when there is not "physical equality" in terms of health status.
