ABSTRACT
The favorite Jewish expression uttered when exposing a shameful secret, “it's a shonde,” is frequently used whenever anyone attempts to discuss Jewish battered women. The meaning of the message is clear to Jews: keep quiet! But, if we only honor the myth of shalom bayit, the peaceful Jewish home, we will never be able to learn how to prevent family violence nor provide the assistance they too need. After two decades of work with battered women and their families, it is clear to me that without exposing the violence in their homes, it is difficult to help them find safety and peace for themselves and their children.
