Failure of Mr. Haversham’s exertions – A reprobate becomes pious – Despondency succeeds to bravado – I, and my companion look for important news, and receive it.

If I had again been brought to wish for life, it was not on account of any enjoyments, which had been, as yet restored to me. The misery I had felt, in consequence of the supposed frailty of Adela, and the perfidy of Mr. Haversham was great, but now from morning till night, and through the night, I was racked by a sense of my own unworthiness. I really felt so much contempt for my own judgment, and such indignation, when I reflected on my culpable rashness, together with such an excruciating sense of the scorn, with which Adela must regard conduct like mine, that anxiety to escape punishment, not unfrequently gave place to a sincere wish that the last punishment were instantly to be inflicted, that I might at once, find a refuge from shame, in the grave.