chapter  3
23 Pages

Chaos and Transformation

For the last 8 years, I have facilitated a grief support group. Grief group is an open group, so there are always new participants, some who stay for a few sessions, some who continue for many months. Each evening is filled with both change and stability. The first level of uncertainty is knowing how many people will come. The number can vary from 6 to 20, so we may need to break up and

make two groups. After the groups are formed, we move from one room to two, draw the chairs together into the number needed, sit down, and begin with a brief orientation and a few group rules. Then we go around the circle and each person says who died and how the death occurred. There is no time to warm up to the discussion, and new people may begin to cry in the first minutes. They have unique stories to tell, stories of sudden deaths in accidents and fires, there may be heart attacks or even murder. There are also stories of long illnesses and descriptions of watching a person you love as this person endures great pain and deteriorates over time.