ABSTRACT

Winner of the 2021 SSTAR Consumer Book Award!

What makes sex magnificent? What are the qualities of extraordinary erotic intimacy and what are the elements that help to bring it about? Is great sex the stuff that people remember nostalgically from the "honeymoon" phase of their relationships, or can sex improve over time?

Magnificent Sex is based on the largest, in-depth interview study ever conducted with people who are having extraordinary sex. It gathers the nuggets for remarkable sex from the "experts", distilling them into an attainable blueprint for ordinary lovers who want to make erotic intimacy grow over the course of a lifetime. Looking at factors including individual and relational qualities, empathic communication and the myths and realities of magnificent sex, this book offers accessible and evidence-based guidance for lovers and therapists alike.

It is replete with frank and often humorous interviews with straight and LGBTQ individuals and couples, those who are "vanilla" and "kinky", monogamous and consensually non-monogamous and healthy and chronically ill. This illuminating book explores the implications of the findings to develop a model that effectively tackles the common problems of low desire and frequency. The "cure" for low desire is to create desirable sex!

part |16 pages

Part I

chapter |6 pages

Introduction

How Did We Come to Be Studying Magnificent Sex?

chapter 1|8 pages

How Did We Set Out to Learn about Magnificent Sex?

From the Dismal to the Ordinary to Optimal Sexual Experience

part |43 pages

Part II

chapter 2|23 pages

The Components of Magnificent Sex

chapter 3|18 pages

Myths and Realities of Magnificent Sex

From Media Stereotypes and Beyond

part III|91 pages

What Leads to Magnificent Sex?

chapter 4|13 pages

Developmental Factors

chapter 5|8 pages

Preparation

chapter 6|11 pages

Enduring Individual Qualities

chapter 7|6 pages

Individual Qualities in-the-Moment

chapter 8|6 pages

Skills

chapter 9|13 pages

Qualities of the Relationship

chapter 10|10 pages

Relational Qualities in-the-Moment

chapter 11|8 pages

The Meta-Factor

Empathic Communication

chapter 12|10 pages

The Pathways towards Magnificent Sex

part |34 pages

Part IV

chapter 14|3 pages

Conclusions