ABSTRACT

Finding true love is a journey of transformation obstructed by numerous psychological obstacles. Being in Love expands the traditional field of psychoanalytic couple therapy, and explores therapeutic methods of working through the obstacles leading to true love.

Becoming who we are is an inherently relational journey: we uncover our truest nature and become most authentically real through the difficult and fearful, yet transformative intersubjective crucibles of our intimate relationships. In this book, Judith Pickering draws comparisons between Bion's concept of becoming in O, and being in love. She searches for pathways that lead away from relational confusion towards the discovery of genuine transformational relationships, and works towards finding better ways of relating to one another. This is achieved by encouraging couples to enjoy the actual presence, humanity, otherness and particularity of each other rather than expecting a partner to conform to our own expectations, projections, desires and presuppositions.

Pickering draws on clinical material, contemporary psychoanalysis, cultural themes from the worlds of mythology and literature, and a wealth of therapeutic techniques in this fresh approach to couple therapy. Being in Love will therefore interest students and practitioners of psychoanalysis, psychology, and couple therapy, as well as all of those seeking to be more authentic in their relationships.

part I|79 pages

Being in love

chapter Chapter 1|20 pages

Love's many facets

chapter Chapter 2|15 pages

The marriage of alterity and altruism

chapter Chapter 3|12 pages

Subject relations

chapter Chapter 4|15 pages

Falling in love: an exogamous initiation

part II|128 pages

The path of love: an obstacle course

chapter Chapter 5|13 pages

Love's therapeutics

chapter Chapter 6|8 pages

Love's uncanny choices

chapter Chapter 7|16 pages

Veils of projection

chapter Chapter 8|11 pages

Relational configurations

chapter Chapter 9|20 pages

Interlocking scenes: a malignant dowry

chapter Chapter 10|14 pages

A hall of mirrors

chapter Chapter 11|17 pages

The narcissism of Echo

chapter Chapter 12|9 pages

Thresholds: Bluebeard's Castle

chapter Chapter 13|18 pages

Don't look back: Orpheus and Eurydice

part III|42 pages

Transformations in love

chapter Chapter 14|16 pages

Exogamy: a marriage of all loves

chapter Chapter 15|11 pages

The iconoclasm of Joy

chapter Chapter 16|9 pages

Laetitia, liveliness and love

chapter Chapter 17|4 pages

Alétheia: becoming in love