ABSTRACT
Although the fundamentally social foundation of the self has been a staple of psychological theories ever since the pioneering writings of Sigmund Freud, William James, Charles Cooley, George Herbert Mead, and many others, “the self” and “close relationships” are commonly treated by scholars in the behavioral and social sciences as if they were distinct topics. For example, nearly every textbook that covers these two topics locates them in separate chapters. Each topic is allowed to influence the other, but they are not viewed as intrinsic to each other. However, evidence has accumulated to point unequivocally to the untenability of this separation. That is, to understand close relationships, one must appreciate the nature and impact of the self; and in parallel fashion, to understand the self, one must comprehend the relationship context in which the self exists. Several important contemporary theories make plain this integral connection (e.g., Bowlby, 1969/1982; Holmes, 2002; Leary & Baumeister, 2000; Markus & Cross, 1990; Ryan & Deci, 2000).
