Affects, reconfiguration of the self and self-states in mourning the loss of a son

These words, from a poem entitled ``Something I Couldn't Tell You,'' were written by Susan Pliner more than ten years after the sudden death of her little boy.

On August 12, 1995, our 23-year-old son, Sean, died on Mount Rainier. He and a fellow park ranger, roped together for safety, fell 1200 feet down an icy glacier while carrying supplies to an injured climber. A tall, strawberry blond with an infectious grin, Sean was an earth science major in college, a passionate outdoorsman and musician. He was the youngest of our three children, and our only son.