ABSTRACT
What is a relationship? Or: What is in a relationship? In this chapter, we ask these and other questions to examine how relationships are valued (and devalued) differentially, that is, in ways that re-/produce differences and norms. We discuss how some relationships are promoted as more important than others; some glorified as ‘right’ or ‘pure’; others condemned as ‘wrong’ or ‘evil’; and some accorded legal and social status that others are denied. We draw on an understanding of categorisation as performative to think about how boundaries in and around relationships are enacted, examining the links and breaking points between labelling, de-/valuing and actual(ising) relationship practices. Referring in part to our own relationship practices (and quoting directly from them via vignettes from our personal lives), we explore ways of queering – doing and undoing – relationships, cautioning against an individualised (neoliberal) approach and suggesting that we remain open to what is possible in our relating to each other.
