ABSTRACT
LGBTQ stepfamilies experience many of the same challenges that heterosexual, cisgender stepfamilies do. Many come to therapy for the same reasons-struggling children, divisions over parenting, fraught ex-spouse relationships, and a stuck insider/outsider position. For both adults and children in LGBTQ stepfamilies, stigma and homophobia can add layers of intensity to parenting decisions, ex-spouse relationships, and the transition to stepfamily. However, creating family outside heteronormative structures can not only soften challenges but foster significant strengths. Key strategies for meeting these challenges include naming and normalizing insider/outsider positions, helping adults attune to children’s experiences, spending fun time as a family while leaving parents in control of discipline while stepparents practice “connection not correction,” and protecting children from adult conflict.
