ABSTRACT
This chapter describes the Safer Families Project, a programme Tavistock Relationships has developed in partnership with a London Borough Children’s Services Department. It also describes a model of therapy which offers the chance for parental couples who have been violent towards one another in the past to begin to work together to contain their feelings, shift their behaviour patterns and be more available to parent their children effectively. Exploring domestic violence through the context of the relationship dynamic can be misread as ‘colluding or detracting from what should be condemned as intolerable behaviour’. Therapists probe for a sense of responsibility and concern around the violence, and for the couple’s capacity to think about safety. The couple continued to work together with their therapist and some of their defensive attitudes began to soften. After six sessions and a review, it was agreed to continue with couple therapy.
