ABSTRACT
In this chapter, the author addresses the problems faced by children who have real difficulties in communicating with grown-ups about their unhappiness. She points out that many young people suffered at the hands of adults either before they had discovered words, or their suffering is literally unspeakable. Children who have suffered severe emotional trauma have rarely felt that they have been heard or understood by another person who they could trust to bear the pain of what they have to say. Verbal communication must be combined with an understanding of the nonverbal and symbolic efforts made by children. Children who have never been able to communicate consider it a huge risk to attempt to do so. The process, from non-verbal communication to verbal communication is known as realisation, symbolisation and conceptualisation. Behaviour which is constantly repeated is usually an indication that there is an important message in the communication which needs understanding.
