ABSTRACT
This chapter explores where the frustrations come from and how they can lead to escalations. It shows that clients profit from a schematic description of this process and addresses escalating and de-escalating language and behaviour. The frustration, which leads to violent behaviour within families, falls within the scope of the categories. They can walk away and calm down, or they can stay in the same situation and the frustration will grow bigger and bigger. Factors of stress, like debts, bad housing, discrimination, relationship problems, illnesses, problems with children, and social issues lead to the irritation phase as the starting point. Substance abuse lower the explosion line. During the process of escalation, the reflective communication is being hindered. More and more, the other becomes an "enemy" one wants to conquer. In many different ways, therapists stimulate de-escalating communication.
