ABSTRACT
Oedipal development is managed to varying degrees, and, like all psychic processes, it involves a lifelong journey. At any point in this journey each individual has internalized a representation of a couple relationships, "the internal couple", which is based on the experience of the parents, whose qualities have been influenced by projections and distortions. The partners in a couple have relating styles are complementary to each other's, although what we often see is a more complex picture with each partner changing positions at different points. In couple work, as in group work, there is a change of focus; the two individuals in the room and the material they provide can be thought about primarily as contributing to an understanding of the relationship, rather than simply expressing meaning in terms of them as individuals. Partners in a couple subtly nudge and pressure each other until they are in a position which is close enough to a shared unconscious phantasy about coupling.
