ABSTRACT
S. Freud's theory of a competing set of instincts seems on the face of it a promising theory to explain the ambiguities inherent in the phrase "getting back to or getting back at". Whereas Thomas Hobbes thought that man's aggression could only be checked by social structures external to the self, Freud, writing more than two centuries later, held the view that limitation on innate aggression is something that is managed internally within the self. It is perhaps self-evident that much domestic violence takes place within a couple context. Hobbes felt that the only check on man's violent self interest was the constraining influence of society's institutions. Secure individuals have a high self regard and also rate their partners highly. Dismissing individuals have a high self regard and low regard for their partners.
