ABSTRACT
Resisting emphasis on family obligation, this chapter challenges assumptions about sibling obligations, shifting focus from blood ties to the importance of mutual respect, honesty, and (self)care. Writing from within the experience of distancing, the chapter offers new vistas on how sibling estrangement is experienced from within the experience of actively achieving distance. Questioning what he wants from his adult sibling tie now that he is a father, the protagonist asks, have I made the right decision in gaining distance from my brother? Unpacking his decision, communicative reactions, and imagining how his son might think/feel about the dissolution of their relationship, the chapter examines what might be history. Moving beyond assumptions about how sibling relationships could/should be to understand how they are, the chapter casts fresh light on possible doubts and relational uncertainties, showing estrangement does not happen on a whim. A process-based explanation of removing oneself from unhealthy environments provides a sketch of how comfort and wellbeing are accomplished.
